It is with great sadness that we announce the passing of all-time great player/coach Reggie Dunlop (AKA Paul Newman). Dunlop was best known for implementing a hard-nosed brand of violent play, which led the Charlestown Chiefs to the champeenship of the Federal Hockey league in 1977. After the Chiefs franchise subsequently folded, Dunlop (Newman) went into the salad dressing business and also had some cameo roles in "The Color of Money" and "Road to Perdition."

One of the most memorable events in Dunlop's life occurred during the run up to the 1977 championship when Dunlop informed the opposing team's goalie, Tommy Hanrahan, that his wife "suck[ed] pussy." After becoming increasingly enraged at the taunts of his wife being a "dyke" and "lesbian," Hanrahan abandoned his goal and engaged in two separate fights with Dunlop. When asked to comment on what had happened on the ice, Dunlop replied, "I told him his wife was a dyke."

Michael Phelps' Olympic Gold Medals Found Tainted with Melamine

As the melamine crisis in China grows, new reports are surfacing that China, in order to conserve precious gold resourses, used the toxic chemical Melamine in the production of the gold medals athletes received at the 2008 Olympics games. While gold medals, unlike milk and baby formula, are not normally ingested, many have expressed concern that athletes have placed their lips on the medals in symbolic kisses, or even put the medals into their mouths in order to bite them (in an age-old test of the soft metal's purity) during photo ops.


Chinese officials have not responded to these latest allegations stemming from what is becoming a national crisis, which began with the discovery of melamine in baby formula produced within China.

Micheal Phelps, who won a record eight gold medals in the Beijing Olympics, has expressed deep concern: "I won eight of those suckers, and I kissed every one of them! Now I'm going to get eight kidney stones!"

So far, the International Olympic Committee has not made any statements, preferring to continue planning for their upcoming announcement, where it is widely believed they will award the next Olympic Games to Zimbabwe.

I'm a broken man on a Halifax pier...

Ok, so the first pre-season game for both Montreal and Boston was last night in Halifax. Bruins (God damn them all) whupped up on the Habbies: final score 8-3.

Good to see you back, Patrice Bergeron. Now, if you could please stop being awesome.

Tanguay gets his first point as a Canadien. Hopefully the purty passing was a hint of things to come.

I'm not going to go into too much depth here, suffice to say that this is a warmup, and neither team had anything close to an NHL roster. Credit where it's due though: Bruins pwned the Habs. Of course, I don't need to tell anyone that the pre-season matters for dinky doo.

The link should explain everything if you don't understand the references.

HELL YEAH!

The wait is finally over. Sundin can leave that fence post up his ass as long as he wants, the chicken-swede. You hear me Mats? You have our permission to play hide and go fuck yourself.

I have always liked Robert Lang, and I'm really excited about him coming to Montreal. He's not as flashy as a Mats Sundin or Alexei Kovalev, but he's dependable.
So, for the upcoming season, the lines are looking something like this:

Kovalev, Plekanec, A. Kostitsyn
Tanguay, Lang, S. Kostitsyn
Higgins, Koivu, Kostopoulos
Lapierre, Chipchura, Laraque

(Latendresse and Begin in reserve, and will probably rotate with Kostopoulos and the entire fourth line.)

Defense looks something like:

Markov, Komisarek
Hamrlik, Gorges
O'Byrne, Bouillon

(Dandenault and Breeze-by digging splinters outta their asses while they ride pine all season whilst eating Bell Centre hot dogs)

And of course in goal, the overrated and inexperienced Carey Price, saddled with nothing less than the expectation that he transmogrify into Patrick Roy.
If that doesn't work out, we've got Denis and Halak to stuff between the pipes and get shell-shocked.

I am very glad to see that Saku Koivu will finally have the burden of primary scoring lifted from his shoulders, as he moves into a secondary scoring/checking role that he should have been filling for the past three years. But I won't be surprised when Lang and Tanguay falter to see him centering the first or second line again. I'm just glad that's not how he's starting the season.

Now I am really interested to see the beginning of the season.
Thank you, Bob Gainey, for finally dealing for some quality players, while keeping our talented youngsters. I won't go so far as to say I think this team can win the Cup, but they finally have the right mix of premiere players, solid veterans, and rising stars (along with a dash of knuckle-sandwich). Now, it all comes down the big question mark in goal. We'll see if Price is the real deal.